Movie Reviews
Punisher: War Zone
What a strangely uneven movie this is. I’m not sure why Thomas Jayne wasn’t tapped for a sequel to the excellent Punisher film he made with John Travolta, but I was reasonably excited to see Ray Stevenson re-inventing the role. Stevenson was excellent as one of the stars of HBO’s Rome, and holds the... »
Driving Force (1989)
Driving Force is one of those movies that reaffirms your faith in the B-grade movie. It’s a thoroughly mediocre film staffed by thoroughly mediocre actors who are nonetheless noteworthy. When they’re all in the same place at the same time, their noteworthy mediocrity reaches a kind of lousy movie critical mass, creating... »
The Mechanic
If you’ve never seen the 1970s thriller The Mechanic, it’s worth the time. While a little slow in spots, the movie is notable for its opening — there is no dialogue for the first quarter hour as Charles Bronson’s hit-man character sets up a remarkably elaborate assassination — and for its detailed characters. This... »
Enter the Ninja
If a movie could beat the crap out of you, kick you in the groin, pummel you with nunchucks, then kick you in the groin again, before bending down and whispering in your ear, “You feel that ache in your nards? That’s justice, buddy,” it would be 1981’s Enter the Ninja. This is a... »
Six-String Samurai
If you’ve never seen the cult film Six-String Samurai, take an hour and a half and do so. This is anthropomorphic rockabilly — an experience that, while filmed on a B-movie budget with Grade D voicework and mediocre foley effort, is nonetheless superbly entertaining and even inspiring. In an alternate timeline, the United States... »
The Dark Knight
I finally saw The Dark Knight recently. If you haven’t seen the film, don’t read these comments, because I’m going to reveal things about the plot herein. First, this is a very good movie, but you didn’t need me to tell you that. The reviews have been very good and, while a lot of people complained... »
Six Pack: Warning, Kenny Rogers Makeout Scene!
For reasons to complicated to list, I was recentlhy reminded of the classic movie Six Pack starring… Kenny Rogers. Yes, that’s right, singer Kenny Rogers, perhaps best known cinematically for The Gambler (and a host of craptacular sequels to it), plays a race car driver who sort of adopts a crew of six car-stripping... »
Cloverfield
My wife and I watched — well, tried to watch — the movie Cloverfield last night. The following are the thoughts that filtered through my nauseated, Cloverfield-addled brain when the credits rolled. There are spoilers involved, if you can all them that, so don’t read on if you intend to indulge in this wretched,... »
Death Wish
Among the movies I think every fan of action, adventure, and thrillers should watch is the classic Charles Bronson picture Death Wish. There are a bunch of sequels, which devolve into mediocrity and almost cartoon-quality violence (and unevenly so — some are fairly brutal, as in Death Wish V: The Face of Death, which... »
Some Westerns Worth Watching
All Westerns, as my wife first told me, are about “dirty men and guns.” On their faces, this is true. You would be hard-pressed to find a Western that does not feature dust- or filth-covered men wielding firearms. However, I think Westerns are popular because they are, fundamentally, about taking action. This is why... »